Top 10 Bar Books - PortlandBarFly.com
Cortney Starr's Top 10 Bar Reads
10. "The Rules," by Sherrie Schneider. This book is perfect for those of you who date wonderful boys who stage-manage shows populated by Neanderthal white hats. While your boy is working, sit in the corner making goo-goo eyes at the audience and read about the "Top 20 tips to catch a husband." I guarantee no one will hit on you, leaving you to laugh at the ditzy author in peace.
9. "Gender, Culture & Power: Toward a Feminist Postmodern Critical Theory," by Ben Agger. This is the book you take with you to the next show. It definitely works as moron repellent. It's also so dense it might as well be in Latin, but at least it's more challenging then some bestseller about trapping men. I was going to put Valerie Solanas' "SCUM Manifesto" in this slot, but most of the men who feed you lines at a bar never saw "I Shot Andy Warhol." Plus, you might break your straw in half making inadvertent stabbing motions.
8. "What to Expect When You're Expecting," by Arlene Eisenberg. This one is perfect if you just want to fuck with people's heads during a night of heavy solo drinking. Just watch their reactions. Any boy who hits on you while you've got this book open is very, very brave.
7. "Vintage Didion," by Joan Didion. I actually read this in a strip-mall bar in Shelton, Washington. I got bored watching my friends play pool, and I didn't feel like dancing with men who had mullets. Joan Didion is a brilliant essayist, and her exploration of the South American drug trade will give you pause before your next line.
6. "Nickel and Dimed," by Barbara Ehrenreich. Think the service industry is as glamorous everywhere as it is in Portland? Think again. Ehrenreich writes about working as a maid, a waitress at a greasy spoon and selling clothes at Wal-Mart. Here's a book that will make you think and appreciate your education.
5. "MoveOn's Fifty Ways to Love Your Country," edited by the MoveOn staff. Great for a night of drinking with friends. You'll get everyone riled up and have them calling for candidates, writing editorials and shopping at a co-op rather then a chain.
4. "Eats, Shoots, and Leaves," by Lynne Truss. Read it and correct the bathroom graffiti.
3, 2, 1. "Rent Girl," "Valencia," "The Chelsea Whistle," by Michelle Tea. Possibly the best young American writer today. These books are perfect for the bar, the beach, and the bus. Tea writes about drinking, sex work, drugs, Peeping Tom step-dads and death in sharp, readable prose. These books go quickly and can be read again and again. She has a book of poetry and has edited a couple of anthologies, too.
10. "The Rules," by Sherrie Schneider. This book is perfect for those of you who date wonderful boys who stage-manage shows populated by Neanderthal white hats. While your boy is working, sit in the corner making goo-goo eyes at the audience and read about the "Top 20 tips to catch a husband." I guarantee no one will hit on you, leaving you to laugh at the ditzy author in peace.
9. "Gender, Culture & Power: Toward a Feminist Postmodern Critical Theory," by Ben Agger. This is the book you take with you to the next show. It definitely works as moron repellent. It's also so dense it might as well be in Latin, but at least it's more challenging then some bestseller about trapping men. I was going to put Valerie Solanas' "SCUM Manifesto" in this slot, but most of the men who feed you lines at a bar never saw "I Shot Andy Warhol." Plus, you might break your straw in half making inadvertent stabbing motions.
8. "What to Expect When You're Expecting," by Arlene Eisenberg. This one is perfect if you just want to fuck with people's heads during a night of heavy solo drinking. Just watch their reactions. Any boy who hits on you while you've got this book open is very, very brave.
7. "Vintage Didion," by Joan Didion. I actually read this in a strip-mall bar in Shelton, Washington. I got bored watching my friends play pool, and I didn't feel like dancing with men who had mullets. Joan Didion is a brilliant essayist, and her exploration of the South American drug trade will give you pause before your next line.
6. "Nickel and Dimed," by Barbara Ehrenreich. Think the service industry is as glamorous everywhere as it is in Portland? Think again. Ehrenreich writes about working as a maid, a waitress at a greasy spoon and selling clothes at Wal-Mart. Here's a book that will make you think and appreciate your education.
5. "MoveOn's Fifty Ways to Love Your Country," edited by the MoveOn staff. Great for a night of drinking with friends. You'll get everyone riled up and have them calling for candidates, writing editorials and shopping at a co-op rather then a chain.
4. "Eats, Shoots, and Leaves," by Lynne Truss. Read it and correct the bathroom graffiti.
3, 2, 1. "Rent Girl," "Valencia," "The Chelsea Whistle," by Michelle Tea. Possibly the best young American writer today. These books are perfect for the bar, the beach, and the bus. Tea writes about drinking, sex work, drugs, Peeping Tom step-dads and death in sharp, readable prose. These books go quickly and can be read again and again. She has a book of poetry and has edited a couple of anthologies, too.
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