Lutz Tavern
4639 SE Woodstock Blvd Portland, OR 97206Phone: (503) 774.0353
Located in: Southeast Portland
BarFly's Review of Lutz Tavern
While the furnishings - aside from a stool-top temporarily decommissioned for the first-ever patrons recent wake - and exterior havent changed since the days when pink neon signified only good cheer, The Lutz remains a model of a blue-collar tavern seamlessly transitioning along with its neighborhood.
A few years past, they served only Blitz and that only in pitchers and those primarily to a aging crew of veteran drunkards and the most-adventurous collegiates. There's pints, now, of course, along with a wall of microbrews, but it's hard to find anybody, whether boothfuls of callow Reedies or the lingering core of older regulars, choosing beyond the dollar cans of Pabst.
I had been here probably 5 times before I realized there was a corner booth immediately to the right as you walk in the front door. At the back corner booth, a girl told me she likes to sleep with girls, and I should just accept it. I almost spit out my High Life in amazement. Who has a problem with that?
...I used to like it here, just bums me out to remember.....Can't you ever treat anyone nice, think I'm gonna make the same mistake twice...E. Smith
ok, first off, the fact that slaytanic wasn't even aware of the "z" in lutz speaks volumes for their understanding of the bar as a whole. second, you have to learn to jive with the place. no, you don't go there for amazing service (although, ahem, perhaps some of us do) you go there to bathe in pink neon light, get drunk on pbr and mingle with the sketchtastic characters that frequent the place. the bartenders are great once you actually start talking to them. it's a scene. it's a good scene. you just have to get into it.
In a well-lit and amiable atmosphere it is almost difficult to not make friends here, be it with bartenders or fellow bar patrons. The beer is cheap and cold and after only a few, it tends to feel like home. Be willing to accept the Lutz and it will envelop you in its warm hug of tender drunkenness. When nothing will console me but an icy blue ribbon there's only one place that satisfies the soul--down beside that pink neon light. Oh Lutz, don't ever change.
OK, listen first time drinkers and just-moved-to-Portland-to-be-an-artist-but-I-think-I'm-a-working-class- anarchist: I know you like to think you're poor even though you're not, there's a certain glamour to being down and out when you're a struggling musician working a day job. So you drink cheap shitty beer at places like the Lutz and don't tip so that the bartenders treat you like shit and you can go on feeling like the everyone hates you and the world owes you. Not very smart! Do us a favor and kill yourself! The Lutz rocks. It has been a staple of Reedies, meth-heads and working class douchebags for 50 years and will continue to be for another 50 as long as you and your suicide sorority sisters stay away. Go to Putters where they want you.
These people are idiots. I have been going to the Lutz for about 2 years now, ever since I moved into the 'hood. It's a great place to hang out; cheap and laid back. Personally I think the bartenders are cool. The bartenders are not ASSHOLES. Maybe they were ignoring you cuz you are a stupid, fat, smelly, cheap asshole yourself. Did you ever think about that?
...is the only reason to go here. The 2 bartenders who worked ignored everything but each other and their food...and the fat ass chick didn't need anymore to eat...and the guy stunk like he'd never heard of soap. You'd think with 2 people working they could stop making puppy faces at each other and serve customers...not.
The bartenders ARE assholes...and lazy assholes too! Sat for 10 minutes waiting for a beer while they watched TV and did crossword puzzles...I'll go elsewhere.
