Pirate's Tavern (CLOSED)

2839 Nw Saint Helens Rd Portland, OR 97210
Phone: (503) 222.6600

Located in: Northwest Portland - Visit Website
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BarFly's Review of Pirate's Tavern (CLOSED)

Closed and now open as (Casa Diablo).

Yo ho ho and a bottle of soy milk. Impossibly implausible pirate-themed vegan roadhouse has plenty of potential, completely unfulfilled. Over-priced and underwhelming, with such a severely limited selection of spirits that if you are not either its owner or owner's spouse, you will probably wish you could b.y.o.b.

Pirate theme is little in evidence; looks like a McMenamin's where someone threw a Pirates of the Carribean birthday party six months ago. Save your drinking and driving for fairer shores.

Nearby Bars
Casa Diablo
Reader Reviews of Pirate's Tavern (CLOSED)
Pirate's Tavern (CLOSED) has 9 user reviews.
New Business

Nude dancing sign went up in the Pirates Tavern perking lot. Bummer for the few people who live around there. I understand its the same owner, which is fitting as the guy rteally creeped me out the few times I ate there. Begs the question...what theme will this place have? A Renaissance Faire strip club?

Reviewed Anonymously by James on January 24, 2008, 1:34 pm
Vegans and DEEP Fried food

VEGAN + Deep Fryer = nausea I ate their mock fish and chips and got deathly ill. Let me say that most who are Vegan have dual purpose (health and compassion). I can't stomach deep fried food nor do I really want to after my experience with the Pirate Nightmare. The chili was so-so but served luke warm. I must say that Portland has a lot of Vegan options, in more Vegan friendly areas of town. Not really suprised this place bombed. What next for the location?? Maybe a RAW FOOD Yoga/Pilates studio with a wine bar?

Reviewed Anonymously by Theresa on January 19, 2008, 6:20 pm
R.I.P.

One of the worst and less comfortable restaurant EVER. Read DJ Gravylegs review for all you need to know.

Worst business plan EVER - HUGE waste of money.

I am so thankful it is GONE!

Reviewed Anonymously by Mitsy on January 16, 2008, 3:25 pm
Are you Kidding me...TOFU?

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

Who the hell else but a California transplant would put a fruity vegan bar in an otherwise fully industrial area. I've worked about a block away for the past two years and when they opened the guys in the neighborhod were like, "Awesome, a new place to get a meal!"...A group of us, me being the smallest in a group (175lbs.)that includes two guys over 300 lbs, walked in and sat down. Place looked decent and after working on semis tractors and trailers all day(which is may day job), we were really excited.When we got ahold of the menu and saw there was no meat on the menu, I thought my boss was gonna die of a stroke. Needless to say we left. If this was the Pearl District, great, to each it's own. I have nothing against anyone for how they look, eat, or whatever. But come on people.......How many vegans do you think work in the Transportaion industry, or How many guys in the Longshoreman Union do you think can't wait to sit down at noon for a heaping platter of fucking TOFU! Move, and let someone decent in your place who will be appreciated by the neighborhood and will actually make some money, 'cause dude your gonna be bankrupt in no time,son....Count on that.

Reviewed By BarFly User DJ Gravylegs on January 14, 2008, 9:02 am
It WAS Great Food

I loved the menu - from 5-8 PM. After 8 they had a drastically reduced menu. They had a pool table which was cool, and I really liked the owner. Doesn't matter anymore, it is closed, they are turning it into a "nude dancing establishment".

Reviewed Anonymously by Daniel on January 5, 2008, 11:09 am
Grease pit

Awful food. I am a lifelong vegetarian and can appreciate the virtues of good and bad vegetarian food. This place is a grease trap. Even the salad stuck to the roof of my mouth. The beers are way too big 24oz, no smaller options and the owner is creepy, he was just sort of walking around staring at everyone as they ate without saying a word. The server tried his best to make his customers happy but I watched 3 meals get sent back from one large table and I can only guess that makes his job suck pretty bad. I didn't send mine back and I didn't ask for a box:) I just left it on the table and with the looks of that owner wouldn't doubt if he didn't eat the leftovers himself:) Vegan Pirate idea is kind of unique, that I will say, but the food isn't working for me. Grease Grease and 1 type of Mock meat used in 40 different dishes...yeah!!! NOT!

Reviewed By BarFly User Edella on May 27, 2007, 6:55 pm
Honesty is the Best Policy

Yay! I'm so glad to see people agreeing with me on this one. This place was so far off the mark it prompted me to write my very first review on another website - you know the one - it has "city" in the name... They give it an average of 4 1/2 stars?!?!? Anyway, we were so disappointed in this place that serves $6 rum drinks. Not creative rum drinks mind you - all they had were basically Rum & Cokes with one, small, carefully measured shot (oh, but you could choose from a few types of rum; gee, thanks!) The menu listed a "rumpunch," but we were told they had not gotten a recipe right, so were not offering it. Huh? People, go to Salvador Molly's if you want fun rum drinks. The pirate theme was extremely poorly executed and the food was just plain strange, and not because it is vegan. This place was awful!

Reviewed Anonymously by Amy on May 3, 2007, 12:35 pm
Yo hum

Bad food. Too much Texturized Soy Protein meatloaf. Nothing fresh. Overpriced. Ridiculously slow wait staff. Could not order a brew at the bar in back. Told to go sit down and wait by the bartender!!!!!!!!!!! Ordered ore gold fires received crinkle cuts straight from the freezer section.

Overly hoppy Rots Organic beer- YUCK!

Stupid, lame pirate theme, not eve implementaed with any taste.

Not worth the drive folks.

And the owner is rude.

Reviewed Anonymously by Lilith on May 1, 2007, 1:26 pm
Check'n for Kyle

My brother works near this joint so I will drop in soon for some Grog, just for you Kyle! I am not dressing up as no pirate though, I too would rather drink Bacon Grease! I will be open minded and give an honest review. Be warned al ye land lubbers!! Isn't that how they say it? I wonder if they will like my Pirate joke? "Pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says did ya know there was a steering wheel in your pants? The pirate says I know and it's driving me nuts!"

Reviewed Anonymously by Ivor on April 16, 2007, 2:58 am
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Overall Rating of Pirate's Tavern (CLOSED)

Absolute boozer heaven
Pretty freakin' nice
Could be worse
Exemplifies mediocrity
Ugh, shoot me.

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