Rocks (CLOSED)
1934 NE Alberta St. Portland, OR 97211Phone: (503) 249.7675
Located in: Northeast Portland
BarFly's Review of Rocks (CLOSED)
Now closed, see Hilt
When one thinks "Alberta St.", sports bar is the last phrase that comes to mind. Still, buried deep within in it's citizen's psyche, located somewhere between fair trade coffee and mental notes to take the Subaru into the shop, there is a desire to see a bunch of sweaty jocks play with balls. Rocks step in to make that pass, yet somehow, it comes up short with it's awkward layout and totally unsportsmanlike interior.
Screaming obscenities at the television, as required in section 4/article VIII of the sports fan rule book, is destined to be frowned upon by an uptight mom who took advantage of the kid friendly policy to slip out of the house, have a margarita, and fantasize about rough sex with a "man's man".
Kid friendly and no smoking means the fun stays out on the patio (small signs remind you to keep your voice down). Though from there, you won't be able to keep track of the score unless you count throwing ham at Last Thursday tourists a sport.
1x pool, 3x TVs
| Rocks (CLOSED) 's Happy Hours | |
|---|---|
| Monday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
| Tuesday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
| Wednesday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
| Thursday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
| Friday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
| Saturday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
| Sunday | $3 well, $3 micro, $1 doms, $2 menu 3-6pm, 11pm-Close |
Another one bites the dust! Quick review: Was there few weeks ago and the employees were bitching about getting paid; I was told that they were "out" of most of the menu items; disgruntled employee gave us a ton of free food and beverage. All signs of the ship going south. Not my first rodeo.
Walked by a couple of times lately and Rocks looks like a ghost town. Walked the pooch by tonight and saw a couple people in the bar (one was the owner) but still shut down. Pulled out the cell to call and line has been disconnected. Time of death...March 09!
My call: don't blame this one on the economy. I'm calling it a good idea with poor business execution.
I LOVE the Portland nightlife culture but really wish every neighborhood would have a nice, satellite TV, cheap beer and good burger, sports bar. THAT is the biggest white space in the food and drink culture here.
Some of the worst food I've eaten. My "cubano" was as dry and tasteless as pork can be. The fries could have been used an nails. And you know how the last bit of spinach in a bag turns black and mushy? My spinach salad was about 20% of that crap. Honestly, what kind of place cheerfully serves a salad full of rotting leaves? Great porch and nice owner, but don't eat here.
