Okay, so after all these rants, you've got to be wondering why I don't quit already and become a librarian. These rants are strictly cathartic, there's a lot that I do like. If it was that insufferable I would have hung up my soda gun and learned Wordperfect a long time ago, I'm not a masochist. (Sorry Mistess Mona. Keep up the good work, though. Bloody Mary, extra horseradish.) Besides, it's hard to write about how much you like something without it being a snore. Fact is, the scathing stuff is just more fun to read. Look at the bar reviews, which ones are the most entertaining? Sometimes bartending is hell on earth, but other times I can't believe I'm getting paid to do this. So here's some of bartending's good points.

1. I get paid to shoot the shit with people, which I do for free anyway.

2. It's nice having cash on you all the time instead of waiting for a check.

3. It beats the hell out of sitting in front of a computer all day getting 'roids.

4. Some of the bouncers are hot. I know, aim high.

5. The cool regulars become your friends.

6. Drunk people can be very entertaining

7. Getting to sleep in every morning.

8. If you can bartend, you can get a job anywhere. Bartending will never become obsolete.

9. It's true you look about 50% more attractive when you are standing behind a bar.

10. Annoyances aside, bartending really is fun.

  There you go, that's why I bartend, and why I will most likely stay with it. Oh, and the money's really too good to turn my back on.

  Now don't invite me to your house party and expect me to make all the drinks.